Greetings from
The Publisher . . .
Another Year & Finding Ways to be Positive
Boy, another year is almost gone—and what a year it's been. Whenever we get to the end of the year I can't help thinking about the year that's past and the coming one. How was it? What to do differently? Has everything gone to hell and each day proves it further? Does everything point to progress in a direction I embrace?
The good news is that there is a convenient artificial construct we all indulge in at least a little bit—the idea that no matter how it's been, we can start over on January 1, or on Monday morning, or even from now on . Whether it's transforming our bodies, renewing our dedication to our personal or spiritual development, saving more money, reading more, or putting more attention on others and helping those in need, we can start anew, again and again.
That is, as long as we have hope. As long as we think things can change. Looking back on the year, seeing areas to improve, or finding fault with one's self is easy enough for most of us. Even if we've escaped that self-judgment, we still have goals we want to accomplish or things we want to explore and do.
How do we evaluate, however, without getting too down on ourselves? How do we avoid the idea that it's the same as it was, again, and won't change?
I know for me that means not expecting everything to change at once. We seem to forget that that extra weight, for instance, didn't appear overnight, and won't disappear overnight either. Most things fall into that category.
Working on a few things at a time helps. It's counterproductive to add stress to the process when we want to bring a positive change to our routine. Being easy on one's self and that remembering Rome wasn't built in a day helps too. Don't they say it's what you do most days that counts? So one double-desert day doesn't mean forget the whole diet, right?
For that matter, even God took one day to rest. I think we need seven days and then a rest day— one with no obligations. No expectations.
One person told me how she starts over daily without judging the previous day. Each night when she goes to bed she thinks of how she wants her life, and what attitude or worldview she wants to wake up with. So she moves past the idea of overwhelm or being a victim, or judging what she did wrong, and moves to how she wants to see herself handling her life when she wakes up. It works well for her.
Since the consensuses of those who research these things tell us that most of our resolutions won't last, I like her approach and have started using it. I'm trying, anyway; often sleep comes too quickly to get through it. At least it seems a good place to end the day.
Depending on what it is, making it a cooperative venture and getting a partner to support us is also an approach that has proved more successful than trying to control “things” by ourselves.
When looking on a personal level or taking a larger worldview, it's no wonder that sustainability is such an issue—a multi-leveled or multi-dimensional one, it seems. We can start over and over again, but sustaining it is the key—and sustaining definitely sounds like work.
I disagree with those who say forget resolutions. That's like giving up hope and accepting we can't change anything. Even when we don't change or sustain our new habits or ways, looking at our life gives us the opportunity to refocus, set goals, or see that there is more to life. As long as we don't end with the thought “it's no use,” that's a good thing. I remember hearing years ago that it requires a higher state of consciousness to question one's life. To be willing to think there might be more available or better ways takes a willingness to question ourselves.
Men have it tough doing that in our society because they are brought up to think they should know the answer already. They should know what to do, almost automatically. Women don't have quite the same pressure—unless, of course, they grow up to be a mom and God knows mom knows everything. Dad's supposed to, Mom just does .
The idea that we can't or won't change is contradicted by life. Life helps us with that. Usually at end year I find progress in some areas and what definitely looks like the opposite in others.
But then, if we think we've had some ups and downs, how would you like to have had the President's year? His popularity and approval ratings have suffered quite a let down this year. Unfortunately, of course, is if he's had a bad year that means we've had a bad year.
It's easier to stay hopeful when focused on just us. If nothing else, we seldom operate at 100% efficiency for 100% of the time, which allows us to think we can do more. Perhaps we can remember that the optimum Flow of creativity and effectiveness requires alternate periods of rest and activity.
The tough part these days is definitely in keeping hope while watching the world. It doesn't matter if you're for the war or against it, it's not going right. Whether it's the economy, rebuilding the Gulf and Florida , who's getting the tax cuts, or who's being overburdened, neither side seems satisfied that enough is being done in the direction they want. What we do seem to have is a general consensus that things aren't being run well.
There are ways to hold that, though; ways to keep us in a good frame of mind. It helps to keep the idea that there is a higher plan unfolding, but we just haven't been let in on it yet. It helps to remember that when we create a context or goal about what we want or where we are going, the first thing that appears is what's in the way of what we want. The thing that has to be changed will be the glaring thing in front of us that needs attention. We asked for it when we declared what we wanted.
A lot of what is going on in our country I put into that category. The more we focus on ensuring that our government follows the Constitution, the more the inconsistencies of the Patriot Act come up.
The more we want to be different and have a higher standard in how we treat people, the more we hear about torture, CIA prisons in Europe, and the inadequacies of the SBA and FEMA to help people get back on their feet.
The more we want to live up to the ideals that we heard this country was supposed to be about when growing up, the more examples we'll see that contradict that ideal.
That isn't bad. It shows us/ US what to fix and put our attention on. It's also hopeful to notice that things can change quickly during times of chaos, and these times do qualify.
This, plus the numerous recent examples that Congress has changed recently, is especially positive. Congress is listening more and more to what their constituents are saying and remembering that there is an election coming up. They aren't running their agenda as much and are starting to notice the leadership—that's us by the way—that is speaking up about what kind of country we want to be. More people are letting them know where they stand, even when they get attacked for doing so.
The sense of fair play that we embrace is being brought up over and over for us to see and define again. That's good. As long as we join in, this can be a positive as well as exciting time to live.
Have a great month,
Steve Hays
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